Given that it’s now almost February, I’m obviously a little slow on the up-take with this post. Also, I haven’t posted in 6 months, so… there’s that. I have some posts planned, but as always, whether or not those actually make it from my brain onto the blog always remains to be seen.
But, in the interest of taking a baby-step towards being a more regular blogger in the new year, I’ve decided to share with you all my resolutions. As you may recall, I kind of hate resolutions. Also, I’m not great at sticking to them (I mean, in 2012 I was like, I’m gonna blog more! Then I posted through July and left y’all in silence for the rest of the year. Super cool of me.) Oh well. Given this year’s resolutions, I’m gonna attempt not to sweat my failures (big and small) so much.
So here’s my big list for 2013:
1. Learn to relax. Generally speaking, I’m really bad at relaxing. I have trouble sitting still. It’s difficult for me to veg out on the couch and not have my brain run through all of the tasks I could (should?) be doing. Learning to relax is actually something I started working toward in the latter half 2012. I joined a yoga studio in August (when I signed up for the trial and mentioned I taught Bar Method, they asked why I wanted to try yoga. My response was: “I’m not exactly relaxed.” The understatement of the year.) I still have a hard time with savasana (the part where you just lay still and are supposed to let your mind go blank). I have a constant stream of thoughts running through my head, like a very stressed out hamster on a wheel. But, y’know, I’m working on it.
2. Try not to be so hard on myself. Like many people, I am my own worst critic. Despite my insane need to constantly be busy (see above) and accomplish things, I also have a running list of all the things I haven’t done yet to make myself feel like no matter what I’m doing, I’m never doing enough. (Doesn’t it sound awesome to be in my head? It is.) This year I’m going to try and let things lie. The house can be dirty. I can have dinner unplanned. I can miss a workout and not silently berate myself about it for an hour. I’m giving myself permission to be less routined, less on top of things, and less of a caretaker of others. (Yes, I totally realize that this is probably the exact opposite of most people’s resolutions. I keep joking that my resolutions for this year are to “eat more, workout less” — but, it’s kind of true.)
3. Say “no” more. As you may remember, last year I decided to say yes more. And frankly, I ended up over-extended and unhappy. I realized that the downside to my plan was that I was so worried about making everyone else happy, that I wasn’t thinking about what would make me happy. So this year, I’m going to be a little more selfish. I’m going to do what I want to do, even if it means saying no to something just because I want to veg out on the couch on a Saturday (haha, oh, even just writing that sounds like “even if it’s just because I bought a dragon and want to teach it to fly.” Like I said, learning to relax is a work in progress for me).
So yeah, I’ve decided that 2013 is going to be about me. And maybe it sounds selfish, lazy, unproductive, and lame — but that’s ok. I’ve realized that judgments like these are really about the people making them, not about me. So if it makes you happy — do it. (Well, unless it’s drugs. Or hurting someone. Let’s be reasonable here, people.) 2013 is about you; and everyone else (including that voice inside your head) can zip it.
So, what are your resolutions this year?